Does anyone enjoy the beach as much as I do? Have you seen that new Facebook meme that says, “I need a time out, send me to the beach and don’t let me come back until my attitude changes.” I think this statement is true for many reasons, some funny, some not.

My most favorite thing to do while at the beach is to just sit on the deck drinking hot tea, while watching the most miraculous of sunsets. (they always seem better at the beach right?) I love hearing the seagulls screech and the waves hitting the sand in a most resonant way that it is almost euphoric. I live a very fast paced life, my brain never sleeps and my eyes only pretend to be closed for 6 hours a night. I have two kids, a husband, and own a fast paced bookkeeping firm. I live for these moments at the beach when I can relax and refuel my soul. There is something serenely inspiring about the ocean and the waves. In an instant they can tug at the sand and pull out all the dirt and weeds that wash ashore and take them right back out to where they belong. I think our lives are like the ocean, and the waves are our soul. They thrust us forward in life, even if we don’t want to go, and they stretch us to our limit and then they pull the deep parts of us back where they reside, all the while cleansing us with crystal clean water along the way.

“You call me out upon the water, the great unknown, where feet may fail and there I find you in the mystery, in oceans deep my faith will stand ….”

For some of us we never had that revelation moment where we asked God into our lives on “this day, at this time.” For some of us we grew up knowing He was our redeemer, He was faithful and He was our loving father. For me, I knew this all along, but the dirt and seaweed overtook me like a storm in the ocean and for years I was “lost at sea.” My world had fallen apart and my family life was non existent. I made my own selfish choices, which led me through a lot of unnecessary physical and emotional pain. Looking back though it was not unnecessary. I needed to go through it because I was trying to lead my own soul. I was trying to guide my own life. I was trying to captain my own ship. You know those movies where the boat sinks and the waves are crashing and no matter how much they flail their arms and try to swim the waves just keep overtaking their human strength? They are left gasping for air, then holding their breath until that one moment they can grasp it before the wave crashes over them again.  For some of us, hard headed, independent, deep thinking individuals we have to go through storms and even sometimes shipwrecks so that we realize that we can’t do this alone. The drowning was my revelation moment. I was 18, with a beautiful baby boy, living in a safe house hiding from my husband for fear he would do as he had told me, and “kill me, because if he could not have me, no one could have me.”

“And I will call upon Your name, and keep my eyes above the waves, when oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace, for I am yours and you are mine…..”

This past year I realized that although I had my realization moment over 14 years ago, I still had not given my past to God and allowed him to erase my past so that he could rewrite my future. I now have an incredible family and an amazing husband who loves me. So stay tuned to hear more about my journey through this thing called life.

“Your grace abounds in deepest waters, your sovereign hand, will be my guide, where feet may fail and fear surrounds me, you’ve never failed and You won’t start now.”